On Monday, the A Star Is Born soundtrack notched its second week atop Billboard’s album chart in yet another coup for Lady Gaga and fresh-faced Americana superstar Bradley Cooper. This came as a bitter disappointment to Migos rapper Quavo, whose pretty lousy debut solo album, Quavo Huncho, had to settle for second place. Ever the opportunist, however, Quavo has since jumped on a flamboyant remix of the disputed A Star Is Born bop “Why Did You Do That.” Here, in a blockbuster Ringer exclusive, is a full transcript of his verse. Now let me go update my LinkedIn just in case this goes poorly.
**Beat drops**
(Rockist rockist rockist rockist)
(Rockist rockist rockist rockist)
(Rockist rockist rockist rockist rockist rockist rockist rockist)Why you come around me with an ass like that (Huncho)
Feed your dog a steak and then you pass like that (Pronto)
Piss yourself in public, you got swag like that (Alamo)
Double-fist them Oscars, shock the SAG like that (De Niro)Fuck Chazelle and what’s-his-face
First Man comin’ in last place
Drink your straight gin by the case
Skin the color of bouillabaisse
(Skrt skrt) Goin’ solo like Ally
(Skrt skrt) But she don’t live in Cali
(Skrt skrt) Second hour, you lost me
(Skrt skrt) Still cried at the grand finale**Lengthy burst of harsh Auto-Tune wailing to convey soullessness of modern pop music.**
Marbles all in your mouth (Mouth)
Maine’s career goin’ south (South)
Made the memes and I sent ’em (Sent ’em)
Rootin’ as you pass Venom (Venom)
Buy you a drink and I stroke your nose
Diss your socks like ‘What are those?’
Mumblin’ koans that don’t work as prose
Best Song nominees unopposed(Skrt)
I bawled when you sang “Shallow,” yeah, so sue me
My album’s almost longer than your movie (Bloat)
You took the no. 1 spot just to screw me (Damn)
Quavo Huncho not about to win no Grammys (No Halsey)**Bizarre Madonna cameo for no reason**
Hey (hey)
Hey (hey)
Hey (hey)
Hey (hey)What (what)
What (what)
What (what)
What (what)I just wanted to tell you that a chart renaissance of organic, quote-unquote “heartfelt” rock music, however pompous and contrived, might make a refreshing contrast to wildly overlong Spotify chart–stuffing rap albums totally exhausting to those of us who haven’t even gotten through that Migos album from January yet.
(This post is the stupidest thing I’ll do all day. You’re welcome.)
