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Smylie Kaufman Is the Perfect Natty Light Salesman

What do you picture when you think of Natural Light beer? Are there sleeves on the people drinking it? (No.) Are there American flags nearby? (Yes.) Is the quantity of Natty Light best described as “a shit ton”? (Oh, yes.)

Smylie Kaufman, 24, drew national attention in April when he surprised the Masters field and played alongside Jordan Spieth in the final pairing. (Kaufman says he learned the Augusta National course by playing Tiger Woods’s video game.) On Thursday, the golfer announced that he was teaming up with Natty Light in a sponsorship deal, and posted photographic evidence to his Twitter account.

It is a perfect union and warrants a closer look. Let’s begin.

1. The seating arrangement: Kaufman is not merely posing with a Natty Light. He is not wearing a Natty Light shirt; he is not ceremonially shaking hands with a Natty Light executive. No: The LSU grad’s announcement comes from atop a throne constructed of Natty Light cases, because he is the Natty Light sovereign, first of his name, of the Natty Light kingdom; long may he reign.

2. The refreshment: The professional athlete in this picture, whose job it is to be athletic professionally, is drinking a Natty Light, or at least holding one, presumably mere moments away from opening it. Here is what I imagine are the two most common activities that drinkers of Natty Light partake in after imbibing:

  • Yelling
  • Drinking more Natty Light

The third activity might be “crushing it,” as in dude, you are CRUSHING IT, where “it” is plaid shirts rolled up to the elbows or getting Paul to confirm that he and his roommates will bring more Natty Light when they come over or perhaps literally crushing beer cans with hands/feet/teeth while onlookers yell YEEEEAHHHHHH. But really any number of successes can be qualified as “crushed,” and Kaufman has made a habit of doing just that on golf courses. Perhaps this makes more sense than it seems.

3. The hat: Kaufman is wearing a Reagan–Bush ’84 hat, a show of support for a campaign that’s gained a weird, bro-y second life in recent years. He was first allowed to vote 26 years after that election. Lest you think this is inadvertent: Kaufman has cultivated a social media presence best described as #woke:

4. The shorts: They’re not Chubbies, but they might as well be.

Anyway, this is everything that I want from a sponsorship. Namely, I believe that the person hawking the product uses it and loves it. Long live Smylie Kaufman, King of the Natty.