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‘Ocean’s 8’ Has No Idea What Urban Commuting Is Like

And 13 other thoughts on the Blanchett-Bullock-Rihanna-centric set photo

(Warner Bros.)
(Warner Bros.)

We said it in June, and again in December: We’re really, really excited for Ocean’s 8, the all-lady spinoff of America’s most celebrity-packed heist series. Warner Bros. released the first official on-set photo Monday, and the ocho look resplendent. Also ridiculous. Here, our staff awards their superlatives (spoiler alert: Rihanna wins).

Best Outerwear: Cate Blanchett’s Cruella De Vil vibes

Best Outerwear, Runner-up: Sandra Bullock’s “I am an Afghan hound” vibes

Most Likely to Live in Park Slope: Sarah Paulson, wearing what appears to be head-to-toe Rachel Comey

Subtlest Product Placement: Podcast legends Blue Apron and Casper

A For Effort Winner: Anne Hathaway, deeply uncomfortable in green snakeskin but working through it

Worst Character Name: We’re thrilled Rihanna is in this; less so that she’s playing “Nine Ball”

Second-Worst Character Name: Bullock’s Debbie Ocean. We get the Danny-Debbie thing, but really? We couldn’t have gone with Deirdre? Delilah? Would have settled for Daisy, even.

Worst Seat: Awkwafina, unfairly seated in the very back corner

Least Realistic Quality: A clean and empty New York City subway car

Most Accurate Representation of Personal Brand: Mindy Kaling, forever wearing really bright coats

Least Accurate Representation of Personal Brand: Helena Bonham Carter, who just isn’t blonde, c’mon guys, that better be a disguise

Best Thieving Accessory: Paulson’s gigantic tan rolling bag

Best Mix of Youthful Rebellion and Age-Appropriate Fashion Choices: Paulson’s ankle-boot-ankle-tattoo combo

Worst Weather Awareness: Tie, Bullock and Paulson and Fenty. Big jackets and holey jeans and exposed ankles: This is not appropriate seasonal dressing in New York.