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Make Han Solo Great Again: Vote Miles Teller

Ringer illustration
Ringer illustration

Yesterday, The Hollywood Reporter published the (reported) shortlist of actors in contention to play Young Han Solo in Phil Lord and Chris Miller’s upcoming spin-off Star Wars prequel. Alden Ehrenreich, the dreamy fake cowboy from Hail, Caesar!, is a finalist, as are Taron Egerton (The Kingsman) and Jack Reynor (Transformers: Age of Extinction). Congratulations to these guys; it was surely a career highlight to stand in a room yelling about the Kessel Run while a casting director did his best Chewie impression. But a mistake has been made. Of all the actors in consideration — Emory Cohen! Ansel Elgort! Every male whom Richard Linklater has ever worked with! — there is only one true Young Han Solo, and he has somehow been cut from the process. We demand a correction. We demand that Disney cast Miles Teller.

Think about it: What do you really want from Young Han Solo? (Besides the ability to stand up and say, “Maybe we shouldn’t make this movie.”) You want swagger; you want a touch of dickhead. You want a dude who gives terrible nicknames to people he’s never met, but who also will get drunk and tweet about how much he loves “Over the Rainbow.” Emory Cohen is too nice. Taron Egerton is too Welsh. Jack Reynor is too Hemsworth, and Alden Ehrenreich is too good an actor. (Would Ryan Gosling be Ryan Gosling if he’d followed Half Nelson with a spaceship movie? No.) Miles Teller is our only hope. Miles Teller is the charismatic, goofy, slightly down-on-his-luck millennial actor we need. We urge you: Vote Miles Teller for Young Han Solo!

This piece originally appeared in the March 16, 2016, edition of the Ringer newsletter.